Telling our Stories, Asking Questions, and Facing Fears.
Hello there friends!
I hope this email finds you well and safe. These days are unprecedented, and for many, including myself, can be filled with fear, anxiety, and doubt. To be honest, I wish I could say that I was prepared for this crises and that each day I've been facing the uncertainty ahead with stalwart fearlessness and faith. But that just isn't the case. We live in a world where people often put on a face and act like they are strong and have it all together. But ACTING strong and BEING strong are two very different things, and I think it does a disservice to ourselves and others when we aren't really honest with our thoughts, feelings, and actions. If you are like me, your mind and heart go through a vast array of emotions wrestling back and forth between what you believe, what you experience, what you hear on the news, and what could lay ahead. You want to have a positive attitude, you want to have faith, you want everything to be ok, but sometimes it isn't ok and you don't actually have a positive outlook. I wish I had all the answers to questions we all ask like,
Why is this happening?
Why is there so much death and suffering? Where is God, and does He even exist? How could he let this happen? What does this mean for my family? How will we make a living? How will we survive? Will there ever be a "Normal" again?
Just last year, my family walked through the devastation of Michael, a catastrophic category 5 hurricane that devastated our community in the Panama City, FL. We asked these questions then as well. This pandemic is new to us, but pain, suffering, and loss are things we all have walked through on some level. This I know for sure, we will never be same and life won't ever be the same. But you know what? I think maybe that is a good thing, and even in the midst of this tragedy I can't help but think that there may be some good to be found as well. For the first time in our living history we have been forced to slow down. In this day and age I find its so easy to drown out and hide the real issues of life going on in our hearts and minds. However, with this forced isolation has freed us from busy schedules and social demands. We have an opportunity to have this time and space to really reflect, ask difficult questions, seek some answers, face insecurities, pursue healing, and consider what actually matters, what is truly important, and what we really need.
In the midst of self-isolation, it has caused me to reflect, face my fears, ask more questions, and seek more answers.
"With so much death happening in the this world right now, why am I still here?" and "What am I going to do with the time that has been given to me?" (Yes, I typed this with the sound of Gandalf the Grey ringing in my ears. All my fellow fantasy nerds out there will appreciate this reference. You know who you are. ;)
The reality is this life on earth is short and temporary - yet we often act like it isn't and sometimes unknowingly pretend we are in total control of our life. We build our lives around things that don't last (money, careers, romances, houses, cars ect) - thinking we will find some peace and happiness, and then are shocked when those things are suddenly taken away. We are left feeling defeated and disillusioned.
Do we need a job, shelter, food, and money to live? Yes. But I wonder if building our joy and our life around getting bigger shelters, fancier foods, fuller bank accounts, and more prestigious careers really brings fulfillment in life and truly answers the questions in our hearts. Personally, I've found they don't. We all want some peace and happiness, but for those things to truly last, we must find our peace and happiness in something that truly lasts - Something or Someone eternal. Perhaps the famed philosopher, scientist and former atheist C.S. Lewis said it best,
“If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation
is that we were made for another world.”
As I ponder some of these questions, I'm brought back to the beginning of my life and what brought me to this point.
What is my purpose? Why did I become an artist? Why is being an artist important?
It all started for me as a little girl. I grew up in an environment that should have been safe, but where I was exposed to forms of abuse no child or person should ever endure. I remember one night as a 6 year old girl crying out from my little bed, "God, If you are real, - save me from this. Show me who you are." From that night I started having a recurring dream where I was swimming and breathing underwater among many types of sea creatures. In the dream, a giant humpback whale approached me and let me ride on its back, talking with me and carrying me through deep waters. It's hard to articulate what I felt then as a child, but after that dream I knew in my heart several things:
1. Life had greater possibilities and would not be defined by the difficult circumstances in which I was currently living.
2. My life would be forever be connected to the sea.
3. I had never been, and would never be alone.
4. God was real, and one way I would experience Him was through nature.
Although it would be many more years until I was able to live near the ocean and pursue painting marine wildlife, this dream is where it all started. There were many obstacles along the way and many years of searching for answers to some of life's most difficult questions. I don't have all the answers but over the next few weeks, I'd love to share with you a more in depth look at my story, some answers I've found, more of my experiences with the underwater world, and what I'm doing now to move forward during Covid-19.
During these unsettling times of an international health crises and social isolation, the importance of art has become even more apparent to me. The power of art is its universal language that builds connection between us and points us to higher truths of what it means to be alive and that there is something greater for us than mere survival.
Art acts as a portal for the mind and the soul that helps us escape the difficulties, pressures, and pains of everyday life. Famed Irish author George Bernard Shaw said it this way. “Without art, the crudeness of life would become unbearable”.
When I paint underwater scenes, I draw from my childhood dreams and experiences as a diver and conservationist that have brought me a sense of tranquility. There's something profoundly healing experienced from the weightlessness and quietness found in the underwater world. In the coming weeks I'll be participating more live stream painting demos and discussions from my studio.
Doing these live streams is one way I hope to foster connection between many of us who feel so isolated, share some peaceful beauty, and help us escape some stress and anxiety for a little while. In whatever way I can, I desire for people to know they aren’t alone, God loves them, we are all in this together, and there is still beauty, peace, and joy to be found.
I'd love to hear from you! How are you holding up during these times? What are some ways you are finding some beauty and joy in your everyday life? How are you dealing with stress? Until we meet again.
Much love to you all.
Joyful Enriquez
Job 12:7-10
Matthew 7:7-8